Friday night, alone again.....so what am I doing tonight, I hear you ask?  Am I going to make up for last Friday night spent cleaning the oven and go out on the town?  Get drunk, dance my ass off, have a 3am breakfast and hit up some yard sales on my way home tomorrow morning?   No, I'm staying home and I'm doing the ironing. This seals it!  I am soooo pathetic!!!  Hahah!!  I'm almost 35 and I can think of nothing more fun to do on a Friday night than stay ...

Friday night, alone again.....so what am I doing tonight, I hear you ask?  Am I going to make up for last Friday night spent cleaning the oven and go out on the town?  Get drunk, dance my ass off, have a 3am breakfast and hit up some yard sales on my way home tomorrow morning?   No, I'm staying home and I'm doing the ironing. This seals it!  I am soooo pathetic!!!  Hahah!!  I'm almost 35 and I can think of nothing more fun to do on a Friday night than stay ...

Don't ask me how, but I stumbled across a site devoted to epitaphs earlier.  The things people have put on their tombstones....   When I am dead and in my grave, and all my bones are rotten. While reading this you'll think of me when I am long forgotten!   Here lies the body of Jonathan Blake Stepped on the gas pedal Instead of the brake   She always said her feet were killing her but nobody believed her   Here lies the body...

Don't ask me how, but I stumbled across a site devoted to epitaphs earlier.  The things people have put on their tombstones....   When I am dead and in my grave, and all my bones are rotten. While reading this you'll think of me when I am long forgotten!   Here lies the body of Jonathan Blake Stepped on the gas pedal Instead of the brake   She always said her feet were killing her but nobody believed her   Here lies the body...

I've heard some of these before, but they're still funny.....   Q. What is the difference between a drug dealer and a hooker?     A. A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.    Q. What's a mixed feeling?     A. When you see your mother-in-law backing off a cliff in your new car.  Q. What's the height of conceit?  A. Having an orgasm and calling out your own name.  Q. What's the definition of ma...

I've heard some of these before, but they're still funny.....   Q. What is the difference between a drug dealer and a hooker?     A. A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.    Q. What's a mixed feeling?     A. When you see your mother-in-law backing off a cliff in your new car.  Q. What's the height of conceit?  A. Having an orgasm and calling out your own name.  Q. What's the definition of ma...

I got a chuckle out of these.  Hope you can do the same. A kindergarten pupil told his teacher he'd found a cat, but it was dead. "How do you know that the cat was dead?" she asked her pupil.  "Because I pissed in its ear and it didn't move," answered the child innocently.  You did WHAT ?!" the teacher exclaimed in surprise.  "You know,"explained the boy, "I leaned over and went 'Pssst!' and it didn't move."   A small boy is sent to bed by his father....

I got a chuckle out of these.  Hope you can do the same. A kindergarten pupil told his teacher he'd found a cat, but it was dead. "How do you know that the cat was dead?" she asked her pupil.  "Because I pissed in its ear and it didn't move," answered the child innocently.  You did WHAT ?!" the teacher exclaimed in surprise.  "You know,"explained the boy, "I leaned over and went 'Pssst!' and it didn't move."   A small boy is sent to bed by his father....

I saw something that no person should ever have to see. An elderly (in his 70's, easily) overweight (very) man in a miniscule speedo. His gut hung so far over his thighs that looking at him from the front he appeared to be naked. It was only when he turned to the side slightly the the speedo was visible - although barely. I can't get the vision out of my head.  Somebody help me.....

I saw something that no person should ever have to see. An elderly (in his 70's, easily) overweight (very) man in a miniscule speedo. His gut hung so far over his thighs that looking at him from the front he appeared to be naked. It was only when he turned to the side slightly the the speedo was visible - although barely. I can't get the vision out of my head.  Somebody help me.....

We went to the St louis zoo on Saturday. We filled up our camelbaks and packed our lunches, and off we went on the Metrolink tram to Forest Park and the zoo.  It was a beautiful day, about 80 degrees and sunny, and we had a really good time.  We strolled around, looking at the animals and also at the statues that decorate the zoo. They usually depict a man (presumably the founder of the zoo) with various animals.  In front of the reptile house there's one of a man with a b...