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Published on June 9, 2004 By dharmagrl In Humor

Don't ask me how, but I stumbled across a site devoted to epitaphs earlier.  The things people have put on their tombstones....

 

When I am dead and in my grave,
and all my bones are rotten.
While reading this you'll think of me
when I am long forgotten!

 

Here lies the body
of Jonathan Blake
Stepped on the gas pedal
Instead of the brake

 

She always said her feet were killing her but nobody believed her

 

Here lies the body of Martha Dias,
Who was always uneasy, and not over pious;She lived to the age of three score and ten,
And gave that to the worms she refused to the men.

 

JOHN T. McMAHON
1930 -
HE WAS A FAILURE AS A HUSBAND AND FATHER
HE WAS INSANE 15 YEARS BECAUSE OF LIQUOR
BUT DIED SOBER
MAY CHRIST HAVE MERCY ON HIS SOUL
HE WAS NOT A PILGRIM

 

Here beneath rest the ashes of a man who was in habit of always postponing everything till the day after. However, at last he improved and really died jan 31 1972

 


Born 1903--Died 1942
Looked up the elevator shaft to see if the car was on the way down. It was.

 

Here lies
Johnny Yeast
Pardon me
For not rising


 

On the 22nd of June
Jonathan Fiddle
Went out of tune

 

Go away, I'm asleep.

 

 

 


Comments
on Jun 09, 2004
- oh dear
on Jun 09, 2004
I personally think 'I told you I was ill' would be a good one.  So would 'Oops'.
on Jun 09, 2004
LMAO "I told you I was ill" -

Here's one for Davey and Mr Frog
"Who said pea's couldn't kill you"
on Jun 09, 2004
Here's one for Davey and Mr Frog
"Who said pea's couldn't kill you"


ahahahaha. I'm dyin' ovah heah. My wife says that if that ever happens, she'll make sure that it goes on my urn.

-- B
on Jun 09, 2004

My wife says that if that ever happens, she'll make sure that it goes on my urn

Are you being cremated?

I also found one that says

Two things I love most,
good horses and beautiful
women, and when I die I hope
they tan this old hide of mine
and make it into a ladies riding
saddle, so I can rest in peace
between the two things I love
most.

 

on Jun 10, 2004
I liked the Johnny Yeast and the "Go away.  I'm sleeping" ones best.  I have really never given any thought to an epitaph.  Something entertaining to ponder though.  I think it is a good opportunity to not take yourself too seriously.
on Jun 10, 2004

My epitaph is going to be 'Invictus'.


I also like the idea of 'I told you I was ill'.

on Jun 10, 2004
I've always liked "No matter where you go, there you are."
on Jun 10, 2004
She always said her feet were killing her but nobody believed her
These are morbidly humorous I felt kind of bad after laughing my ass off.