I can read too, can I have a job with SBC Tech support?!

Published on October 10, 2005 By dharmagrl In Internet

The following is an excerpt from a conversation I had with SBC tech support earlier this evening:

Me: I'm having a problem connecting to the internet and i wanted to see if you had had any reports of issues in my area.

SBC: yes sir, let me check that for you.

Me: It's ma'am.

SBC: Alright sir, I'm sorry about that.

Me: it's ma'm.

SBC: yes, yes, I meant ma'am. Well, I'm not seeing any problems as reported in your area, can you tell me what your modem looks like? Are all the lights on?

Me: No, the 'internet' light isn't on. It hasn't been on for the past half an hour, that's why I'm calling you.

SBC: Ah, the internet light isn't on. Well, that means that you're not getting any internet. When the internet light is off, you won't get internet.

Me: *temporarily silenced by the stupidity of the tech support chick* Umm......

SBC: In order for the internet to get to your computer, the internet light on your modem must be on.

Me: Hello? Is this tech support? I think I might have been diverted to the wrong department.

SBC: Yes, this is tech support.

Me: No offense, but I called you, you tech support people, because I had tried everything I knew to do at home to fix this problem. I called you because you're supposed to be more knowledgeable than I. So far, you're not telling me anything I didn't already know. In fact, I'd have got more help from my child. Are you reading from the manual?

SBC: No, I'm not reading from the manual.

Me: You're reading from something. A cheat sheet, a list, something. You're not giving me any technical support, that's for sure. Are you guys hiring? Can I get a job there? Because I, apparently, know more about this than you.

SBC: We're getting to the issue, the issue is that your internet light isn't on, therefore you will not get nternet to your computer.

Me: *temporarily stunned, again* Ahh.....yes, I know that. I told YOU that. I'm aware of WHAT the problem is, but what I don't know is how to fix it. That's why I called you. You are supposed to know how to help me fix this problem.

SBC: Well, the problem is the internet light on...

Me: *interrupting her* You know what, I'm just going to fix this myself. You've been no help at all. You have yourself a wonderful eveing....or day, or whatever time it is in India.

SBC: Well, I can help you sort out your problem if we can just get that internet light back on on your modem.....

Me: Good bye! *and I hang up*.

I think that if my life ever comes apart at the seams, if I ever find myself in dire need of a job.....that I will either give myself a stage name of Busty Rhymes and go make money taking my clothes off for strangers, or I will move to India and get a job with SBC technical support. I'm qualified to do either...I've got a set of DD's and I know what each of the little lights on the front of my DSL modem means.

'Technical Support' used to mean something. Apparently one needs neither technical knowledge OR customer support skills to work for SBC.

Comments (Page 1)

HC1240

on Oct 10, 2005

LOL... I was going to say, "At least you could understand her english," and then I read about tech support being in India.

They must not be paying them much... they truly are ignorant sometimes.

Glad to see you got it up and running again.

dharmagrl

on Oct 10, 2005

Glad to see you got it up and running again.

Yeah, I figured out what the issue was. It's the modem. The crappy modem that SBC sold us last year that isn't really compatible with ANYHTHING available on the free market, just with other SBC crappy products. I doesn't like the wireless router. So, looks like we're going to make do for now, but we're definitely getting a new modem.

SBC suck. That's all there is to it. They just suck.

_02

on Oct 10, 2005

It was the same at Earthlink. Try getting your bill with them switched to automatic payment. After 2 months on the phone with them and nasty letters from them telling me my bill was late, I told them to take their service and shove it. That was after a long string of problems with their so called tech support. Seems nowadays any one can get a job in tech support. Half of them don't even know what town they're in let alone who they work for. I guess it's all in the name of saving a buck in the minds of the idiots who will lose even more when their customers leave because of no tech support. I think greed has taken over the minds of the managers and owners of these companies, and common sense has flown out the window. Sorry you had that trouble. Looks like a long lasting trend we're in though.

tjesterb

on Oct 10, 2005

a set of DD's and I know what each of the little lights on the front of my DSL modem means.

Wow! Brains and...er, um, other "assets"

You're hired!

Jafo

on Oct 10, 2005

I got to 'got a set of DD's' and my mind just wandered.......what was your question again, Sir?.....

dharmagrl

on Oct 10, 2005

Seems nowadays any one can get a job in tech support. Half of them don't even know what town they're in let alone who they work for. I guess it's all in the name of saving a buck in the minds of the idiots who will lose even more when their customers leave because of no tech support.

I'm seriously thinking of applying for a SBC tech support job.

This outsourcing crap wouldn't be so bad if 1) Icould understand what they're saying 2) they have an idea of how American businesses operate, and 3) they had some knowledge that, I the customer, do not have. If they can help me, in other words.

I've run into outsourced technical or customer support issues 4 times in the past year, and every time I've come away from the experience unsatisfied and aggrivated. I said that I wouldn't deal with Circuit City again - and I haven't. I said that Compaq wouldn't be getting any more of my business - and they hsven't. but SBC...well, there are very few choices for home telephone and internet service providers where I live at, so SBC have my business by default. They're treated us VERY badly in the past year. They've messed up our contracts, over charged us - this month, they overcharged us by $50. They know it, but we have to still pay it. The bill has closed, you see. They can't go back and alter it. So, we have to pay the $50 so's they can credit it back to us next month. If we don't pay it, they'll see it as 'past due' and send it to their collections department and might even threaten to disconenct our service.
I was disillusioned BEFORE I spoke to dumb girl this evening. Now....and now that I know about their crappy modem....now I'm REALLY disillusioned, perhaps even disgruntled.

dharmagrl

on Oct 10, 2005

Wow! Brains and...er, um, other "assets"

You're hired!

Cool! When do I start?! lol

got to 'got a set of DD's' and my mind just wandered.......

Yeah, I get that a lot.

Spc Nobody Special

on Oct 10, 2005

I'm qualified to do either

Why not do both? I think that stripper web support could be very popular. It would certainly be different and make money..........

starkers

on Oct 10, 2005

dharmagrl...I've frequently struck totally inept tech support people who know less than I, and it's surely annoying to waste your time and money, just to discover that, but isn't stripping for strangers is a bit drastic.

The problem is obviously the 'lights' on your modem......perhaps another, more competent ISP would 'ENLIGHTEN' you.

Jafo

on Oct 10, 2005

Sleeping Dragon

on Oct 10, 2005

SBC suck. That's all there is to it. They just suck

Definitely. I spent about three hours on the phone with them telling them they ran the phone line to the wrong apartment number. Their repairman was here and verified it. I'm still fighting collection agencies over the bill of a connection that was never received. I don't have DD's. I have a single P. I'm glad it's not a sexist thing.

ama02

on Oct 10, 2005

I don't have DD's. I have a single P.

RedBuzzard

on Oct 11, 2005

OMG!!!!!!

Fuzzy Logic

on Oct 11, 2005

I'm seriously thinking of applying for a SBC tech support job.

You can, however, there are a few qualifications you will need: You need to be Indian, you must have a degree and you must be willing to work for 10 rupees an hour (comes to about $2.50 per week). If you meet those requirements you can start Monday

dharmagrl

on Oct 11, 2005

I think that stripper web support could be very popular

Kind of like strip opker? every timw you come up with a problem, I take off an article of clothing? Hmm...that has possibilities.

and it's surely annoying to waste your time and money, just to discover that, but isn't stripping for strangers is a bit drastic

So's moving to India.

Jafo

Thing is, I'm not stupid. I have DD's AND a brain. I'm by no means the smartest chick ever, but I'm no dummy either.

Besides, my favorite T-shirt slogan has 'who needs big boobs' on the front, and 'when you have an ass like this' on the back. (yeah, I have both).

Definitely

I'm sorry that you had problems, but I'm glad I'm not alone.

I don't have DD's. I have a single P

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAH!!

OMG!!!!!!

Was that at the breathtakingly inept tech support girl, or at my DD's?

You need to be Indian,

Darn. Well, there goes my chance.

Welcome Guest! Please take the time to register with us.
There are many great features available to you once you register, including:

Richer content, access to many features that are disabled for guests like commenting on the forums.
Access to a great community, with a massive database of many, many areas of interest.
Access to contests & subscription offers like exclusive emails.
It's simple, and FREE!