Momma's going to have to kick some ass.......

Published on July 12, 2004 By dharmagrl In Misc

My children and I have been spending quite a bit of time at the pool recently.

My 11 year old daughter, who is...ahem...quite developed for her age, shall we say, has been getting a lot of attention.

Not from kids her own age.

Not even from kids who are 1 or 2 years older than her.

From 18+ year olds.

She's pretty good about standing up for herself, and most of the time will handle herself and the situation alone.

There have been occasions, and these occasions are becoming more and more frequent, where momma has to step in.

When I say situations, let me explain what I'm talking about: overt comments of a sexual nature, such as asking her what her bra size is, telling her she has a "nice booty", if she dates, if she's kissed anyone....comments that are totally inappropriate.

My usual stance is to ask the kids to please leave her alone. If they don't, my next reaction is to explain what Shea's dad does, and to ask if they really want their folks to get a call from Security Forces asking why they were coming on to an 11 year old girl. That usually works.

Shea has complained once that some guy 'accidentally' brushed her butt whilst she was in the water. This was a guy that had made a couple of comments to her earlier. I asked her to show me where he was, but when we went and looked we couldn't find him. Lucky him. She said she'd recognize him if she saw him again, so every time we go now we're on the lookout. If and when we see him, I'll give him the 'I'm sure it was an accident, but if it happens again" brief..and if it does happen again, I'll have no qualms getting law enforcement involved. None. I'll also have no qualms about 'accidentally' grabbing his nuts and twisting them a full 360 degrees until he gets the message that he doesn't speak to, come on to, touch, look at or think about my 11 year old child in any way, shape or form. I'll also have no qualms about letting his folks know that they have a wanna-be pedophile living under their roof. Do you think he'll get the message?

My daughter is a little girl. She may have an adult-esque body, but she doesn't have the maturity to back that up. She shouldn't have to deal with comments like that. She's not going to HAVE to deal woth situations like that.

Mommas going to start taking names and kicking ass......

Comments (Page 3)

Dragonscat

on Jul 21, 2004

This discussion is a fascinating read.... I'm not married yet (give me a year-ish), nor do I have kids (at the moment we're not even planning on it) so I don't have anything I can add from personal experience. Even though I don't really want kids, I've always wondered at odd times how I would do as a parent - like when I'm clothes shopping and can't find anything I like because it's all designed for the MTV demographic, or when I'm watching TV and see a commercial or a snippet of show that makes me wonder what we're doing to ourselves. Reading comments like these - from people trying to be the best parents they can - is just... I don't have the words for it. It's amazing. One of the reasons I don't want kids is that I don't think I'd be able to deal with this sort of thing. I wish I _did_ have the words for it, because not being able to say this right is driving me nuts.

dharmagrl

on Jul 21, 2004

One of the reasons I don't want kids is that I don't think I'd be able to deal with this sort of thing

You just muddle through the best way you can. I find that a 'fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants' style parenting works best for me. Being too staunch and rigid isn't a good thing whn you have pre-teen kids. That's not to say that I don't enforce the rules, I do. I just take each situation as it comes, evaluate it on it's individual merits, and act accordingly.

I didn't think that I'd be able to cope before I had kids either. If you look at it as being an instant parent of an 11 year old it does seem very daunting..but these are the little people I carried inside me, birthed, nursed, raised...I know them better than they know themselves. It's not so bad.

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