Knitting. Yarn. Fiber artistry. More knitting. Nursing school. Hospice work. Death and the dying process. Phoenix Raven's. Knitting. Yarn. Oh, and Life As An Air Force Wife.

Ho hum.  That's how I feel today. It's cool, overcast and raining, which doesn't help much.

 I think that the anger, frustration and nervous tension have finally taken their toll. For 3 weeks all I've done is worry.  Worry about where we're going, whether Dave will get extended or not, whether the paperwork is getting to where it needs to be, if we're going to have enough time to get what we need done, if I should re-enroll our kids in the local school system....all stuff with the potential to be life-altering. 

It's taken it's toll on Lonesome and I as well.  It caused some tension between us, and I don't like that.  It would have been hard enough going through this with him here, but at least we'd have been able to kiss and make up after a tiff.  Because he's gone, we can't do that.  Yes, we can talk on the phone, we can email, but it's not the same.

I'm just...blah, I guess.  Apathetic.  Could care less about much of anything.  That's just on the surface, though. Underneath I can still feel my anger simmering, waiting for something to come to a boil about. 

I really don't like this.  Not at all.


Comments (Page 1)
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on Jun 09, 2004
Perfectly understandable under the circumstances. It'll be better once you have your orders and the move is over with. (THAT is the really stressful part)
on Jun 09, 2004

But then I'm going to be doing something, Mason.  I'm ok as long as I'm doing something, because then I have a constructive outlet.  It's the not being able to do anything that gets to me. 


Like today: I bought a family pass for the outdoor pool on Monday.  I had plans on getting all my chores done in the mornings, then taking my kids and going to the pool in the afternoons. Now, because it's raining, we can't go.  We couldn't go yesterday either.


I'm starting to feel like the universe has something against me.

on Jun 09, 2004
Ah, the best laid plans.........

I know EXACTLY how you feel.
on Jun 09, 2004
not the universe Dharm. Just your own field of negativity. I wouldn't be surprised if you expected the weather to be crummy after you bought the pass. The blahs sure suck and it's hard to get out of it. But you have your loved ones. What more do you need? Lots I know you know what I'm saying. For being a military spouse you have it good compared to around 1000+ women who (used) to be in your situation. Your life is good.
on Jun 09, 2004

Hang in Dharma... you've still got us! imagine a life without all of your JUsers to keep you company and sympathize with you...


 


btw... please don't take offense to me deleting your comment on my thousand words article... i want to try something different with that one.  I wanna see if a whole thread can run on just clip art and pics... and       of course...

on Jun 09, 2004
and when is mouse's house going to be in your favorites section ma'am?
on Jun 09, 2004
How you feel is completely normal and understandable. There is nothing worse than feeling that you have no control over things. Especially when the things you can't control are, as you say, life altering. I feel for you. I hope you can find some peace for yourself during this hard time (a nice thing to say, but sadly I can't offer any advice how. Sorry!). And I really hope the weather fines up - nothing like the weather appearing to reflect your mood, hey?
Take care,
Suz
on Jun 09, 2004
Hang in there doll, I will send some happiness your way!
on Jun 09, 2004

Just your own field of negativity

Hmm...perhaps.  My point in writing this was that after all the yelling, frustration etc I'm left with...nothing.  Nothing to show for all the strife.  I have to wait (again) to get the result.  I wonder if this is the universe's way of making me go sit in the corner and color and be patient (not something I'm terribly good at)

btw... please don't take offense to me deleting your comment on my thousand words article

None taken, and I had hoped that you would.

Thanks all, for you thoughts.  I'm just going to have to be patient, that's all.  It'll all work out in the end...I'm just tired of being thwarted at every opportunity.

 

 

on Jun 10, 2004
This too, shall pass, Dharma...and you'll have Lonesome back home, and then you can kiss and make up--and make up for lost time. Hang in there, it's almost over!!!
on Jun 10, 2004

I know, Theresa.......it's hard, though.  I'm still wondering what the hell I did wrong.


Then I see that shit happens, sometimes for no reason, and it's not what happens to you but how you react to it that counts.

on Jun 10, 2004
Then I see that shit happens, sometimes for no reason, and it's not what happens to you but how you react to it that counts.


Too true, too true. Oh, and btw, it's "Teresa", with no H.....just for the record.....
on Jun 10, 2004

"Teresa", with no H.....just for the record.....

Oops!  Sorry......

on Jun 10, 2004
"Teresa", with no H.....just for the record.....Oops! Sorry......


No problem, really....I'm getting better at not biting people's heads off for it! Besides, you're British, so you have an excuse...you spell things weird anyhow.....
on Jun 10, 2004
Yes we do tend to colour our favourite words with unneccessary additional letters. Perhaps they should start fining us for it....I wonder if they'd take a cheque?
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