Why is it that some people seem to thrive on other's misfortune?
I know a few people like that....they really seem to enjoy making other people feel small. They say that they like to see people 'taken down a peg or two'; they're happy when someone else fails. They behave as though they're morally superior.....but they never make any claims of perfection themselves. To do so would crack the facade that they've created for themselves, so they are very vocal about some of the mistakes that they've made. These people have to have someone to dislike. Without someone or something to hate or villify, they're empty.
On the other side of the coin, there are the people who have an inherent ability to bring others up. These people are genuinely happy for other people's good fortune - when they say they're happy for someone, they truly mean it. They thrive on other people's happiness, they're the kind of people who seem to eminate happiness and kindness.
I used to be a hater. I found reasons to not like people. If I found someone to dislike, I would take every opportunity I could to let them know that I was better than them in every way imaginable. I would pick and dig and do anything I could to make them feel small and worthless. I complained and bitched about everyone, from my in laws to my neighbors to people I met on the street. It didn't matter to me if they were old, disabled, educated or not.....if they were breathing, they were fair game, and if they complained about my behaviour I took that as a sign of weakness and went even further.
I did it, I think, because I really wasn't much of anything myself. I was a pathetic, worthless excuse for a human being.
I don't know what made me change. I can't pinpoint one single event that caused me to not want to be that way anymore. Perhaps I got tired of being miserable both in personality and attitude, perhaps I simply grew up and didn't feel the need to maliciously manipulate other people to make myself feel good anymore. Perhaps I got tired of all the drama and the tension and the constant need to climb over people to make myself stand taller than everyone else.
But change I did....and I still am. It's sometimes still tempting to shit on someone else so I can make myself appear to smell good....but I'm trying to resist that temptation, and for the most part I'm succeeding.
Some people, though...they won't change. They don't feel like they need to change. Changing yourself implies that who/what you already are is deficient in some way...they're not deficient, and they have a whole trail of bodies in their wake to prove it.
That makes me sad.