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Published on October 29, 2004 By dharmagrl In Misc

"It's been a year, D.  A year today"

"Yep.  Yep, it has"

We sit there in silent awkwardness, him not really knowing what to say and me not wanting to say it.

I can feel the cork on the bottle loosen slightly.

"I.........never mind"

I stuff it back in, I ram that stopper down as hard as I can.  I can feel the bottle buzz and hum slightly, as if the things within have awakened in anticpation of freedom.

I know that I mustn't let them out.  I know what nastiness lies within, I know what will happen if somehow that stopper fails and those things are allowed to come out.

I know that I have to keep them in, because I have a life, I have.....I have.....

I want to let them out.

 


Comments
on Oct 29, 2004
I want to let them out.


Me too, Dahrma. Me too...
on Oct 29, 2004

Me too, Dahrma. Me too...

Want to trade off?  I tell you, you tell me?

You have my email...

on Oct 29, 2004
I don't know what this means, but it's very haunting and intriguing.
on Oct 29, 2004
but it's very haunting and intriguing.


I thought that too ...hope all's ok dharma
on Oct 29, 2004
I don't know what this means, but it's very haunting and intriguing.


Yes, although I must admit to a few dirty thoughts when I first saw the title........
on Oct 30, 2004
It's been a year since K's accident guys...

Isn't it weird looking back and wondering how you survived? Wondering why you were the lucky one? Reliving all those emotions? I hate anniversaries.
on Oct 30, 2004

Marcie got it.


Yes, yes, and yes, Marcie.


It sucks, to be honest.  I feel like crying all the time and even though I have cried I still feel like I'm full of....I dunno what.


I'm staying away from the Jeep this weekend, and I'm not driving..we're going to Indiana to see D's family today and he's driving the whole way.


Thanks for the comments......

on Oct 30, 2004
I think in some ways Dharma you've changed alot and you know it inside.
The cork will come out oneday. You know it will. Your stronger for it. When the time is right it will all happen for you.
IN the meantime Dharma understand that it is all part of the process and experience every part of it.
You've got lots of love coming from here.
Big hugs
P
on Oct 30, 2004
(((((Karen)))))
on Oct 31, 2004
I know it's cliché but 'Things always happen for a reason'....
Feel free to uncork the bottle dharma, i think it's the best thing for you to do.
Your wonderful family and the bloggers who care are here for you.
=HUGS=
on Oct 31, 2004
Island gurl had it right.....Things happen for a reason. You may never know what the reason was, but you can be grateful for everyday.
Find a quiet space with your sweetie and let it out.....it will do you good.