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I must live in the dumbest neighborhood in the USA
Published on May 27, 2004 By dharmagrl In Home & Family

My neighbor is a retard. A straight up idiot.

Between out 2 houses there is a strip of grass that's about 20 ft wide.  One end of it leads out into the street, the other to a huge playground and open field area behind the houses.  Our houses are split level, which means that the bedroom windows are at ground level along the side of the house where the grass is.

This moron is out there, on the strip of grass between the houses, golfing.  Hitting golf balls out into the street where everyone's cars are parked.  He's hit the external wall of my house 4 times now, and has tapped Shea's bedroom window once.  I don't know if he's hit any cars yet...mine's in the garage, so it's safe, but there's a very nice Durango directly in his line of fire, and an Intrepid parked right next to it.

We have all this open field and grassland less than 25 feet away, but he chooses to golf by the side of my house, and is hitting the balls out into the street, no less!

Sometimes I wonder how some people make it through the day without injuring themselves or someone else.

 


Comments (Page 1)
2 Pages1 2 
on May 27, 2004
Wow... you're right, he's an idiot. Does he have any relation to that be-otch who would call Social Services and tell them you were leaving your kids home along and crap?

~Sarah
on May 27, 2004

Yeah.  He's married to her.

Need I say more?

on May 27, 2004
They'd better be happy you're a nice person... within reason of course.

(oh, and I meant alone, not along... but I'm sure you caught that. lol)

~Sarah
on May 27, 2004

Yeah, I'm a nice enough person, I suppose...nice enough to not retaliate and do unto them as they have done unto me.  However, I am only human and can only take so much crap before I have to act.  The way things are going there'll be a confrontation before the summer's over. 

I know what you meant, Sarah-The-Beautiful!

on May 27, 2004
It's times like that I'm ticked off that I can't buy a permit to have people whacked.
on May 28, 2004

It's times like that I'm ticked off that I can't buy a permit to have people whacked.

I'm torn.  On the one hand I don't like to wish bad on anyone..but on the other I can't think of more deserving people than those two. 

I mean, what kind of idiot...never mind, don't answer that.

on May 28, 2004

Yeah. He's married to her.
Need I say more?

Well, I guess you *should* expect that from him.  He is obviously not completely there in the grey matter department.

on May 28, 2004

He is obviously not completely there in the grey matter department.

Yeah, I'm starting to wonder how in the hell he managed to pass the ASVAB and get into the military.  Both of them seem to be missing some important mental link...its as if they 'see, then do'.  Normal people, 'see, think, then do'....my neighbors are missing the 'think' part of the process.

Like I said, I wonder how they make it though the day uninjured and intact.

on May 28, 2004
but there's a very nice Durango directly in his line of fire, and an Intrepid parked right next to it.


I know this is off topic, but is it just me or are the marketing departments of automanufacturers scartching at the bottom of a very deep and dank mental barrel for the names of their cars.

What not call them the Dungdontgo and the Insipid.

Marco XX
on May 28, 2004

I have long wondered the same thing myself, Marco.

My neighbors could get jobs naming cars.  I'm sure they'd do remarkabley well at it.

on May 28, 2004

Yikes.  I wish we could say that there aren't many people that dim witted but I am sure you know the truth about that matter.


As far as more deserving people to have whacked, I think we all know some of those too.  Tards can be tolerated, people who are intelligent but use their intelligence to inflict grief on others are the ones who can't be tolerated.b

on May 28, 2004

Tards can be tolerated


Coffee on the monitor again......ROFLMAO!!!!


Yeah, if people are retards and don't know better...well, there's an innocence to that which makes things easier to bear, dig?


People who are supposedly smarter than that but who choose to behave in an ignorant or idiotic manner...well, those are the ones that make me want to either exterminate them or sterilize them so they can't breed and pass on their ignorance to a future generation.


 

on May 28, 2004
I find it odd how he's hit your house 4 times now and he's still out there hitting the golf balls. He's damaging your personal property, your main asset in life (if you own). Break his arm. What I would do is this: when he's between the houses, get on your roof on the opposite side, and roll a bowling ball down the slope of the roof and it'll either hit him and hurt him or miss him and scare him. You will not be charged if you can show good reason why you were on your roof with a bowling ball and accidents always happen. With his blatant disregard for anyone's property, it's obvious his actions are no different than if he were throwing the golf balls really really hard against your house. He's disregarding everyone around him all in the name of his likely super shitty handicap. Slaughter the bastard already.
on May 28, 2004
Ahh, Todd, you're hilarious
~Sarah
on May 28, 2004
get on your roof on the opposite side, and roll a bowling ball down the slope of the roof


Or you could just drop golf balls on his head every time he whacks one.

-- B

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