Arrrrggghhh! Boys!!!!

Published on May 25, 2004 By dharmagrl In Home & Family

I'm going to certifably insane by the end of the summer.

The madness in this house has already begun, and it's not even June yet.

It's my boys. A prime example of sibling rivalry at it's finest. One always has to be better than the other. One always has to be 'top dog', and if it means physically beating the other into submission then so be it.

Every evening for the past week they've got into a fist fight. Every evening I've separated them and admonished them for their violence. Instead of diminishing, the animosity has been escalating.

I spoke to Lonesome about it yesterday. I said I didn't know if I could do this all summer. He said that they were boys, and that that's what boys did - fight. Especially brothers. He said to let them knock the crap out of each other, to not step in. Alright, I thought, I'll let them have at it.

Tonight it came to a head. Davey and Jake were going to play "poker" (not real poker, something Davey created so he can make up the rules as he goes along and beat the pants off Jake - sibling rivalry again). They got into an argument over the poker chips. Pushing and shoving ensued, and before I knew it, a full-on brawl was taking place in my living room. Davey had Jake in a head lock, Jake broke free and caught Davey with a left hook, knocking his glasses off, cutting his eye and bruising his face. The glasses flew across the room, mangled and missing a lens. Both boys started screaming that they were hurt, Davey holding his bloodied face and Jake holding his skinned and reddened knuckles. I stood there and laughed. I couldn't help it. I tried not to let them see, I attempted to cover up my giggles with feigned anger and irritation...and I think it worked. I was just so......so......I don't know how to describe it, other than to say that when you're at the end of your tether your emotions get all mixed up and inappropriate.

So, a trip to the optical shop and some ice and band-aids later, we're all speaking to each other again.

Until tomorrow. I can guarantee that it will happen again tomorrow. Perhaps not to this degree, but it will happen.

I'm going to be certifiably insane by the end of the summer.

Comments (Page 1)

werewolf

on May 25, 2004

ewww, I feel your pain. I've got two of 'em myself. 12 and 13. When they are in their rooms together, it doesn't take long before yelling and screaming starts. Eventually either one or the other gets hurt, or one of them slams out of the room and things calm down. They will then congregate back in their room and the cycle repeats. They have yet to do any serious harm to each other, but I can't imagine that will last.

I used to get pissed, now I just let it go. It was taking way, way too much energy and draining my good mood away. Unless I think they are going to start poking each other with sharp things or pushing heads through wallboard, they can just go at it.

I'm not sure what I would do if one of them actually threw a punch at the face of the other though. The wrath of DAD-MAN would certainly rear its ugly head and I would most likely drag the closest one out of the room and deposit him outside in the yard.

Good luck

BlueDev

on May 25, 2004

Wow, maybe I am glad I have two girls!!!

But, having been through it with my brother I can speak from personal experience that sometimes you just have to let boys get it out. Often after we smacked each other around we would feel truly sorry for what we did. And it was always a far greater remorse than when mom or dad broke it up and grounded one or the other (or whatever the punishment was). Best of luck with them both dharma!

dharmagrl

on May 25, 2004

Hey, Dave! How the heck are you?!

I didn't know what to do...I still don't know what to do. I've taken away the promised summer pool-pass, and I suppose I'll just continue taking things away until they get the message that it's not acceptable to hit each other...

dharmagrl

on May 25, 2004

Well, Dev, I dunno. After dealing with Shea and her fluctuating hormones I think that I'd rather have boys who duke it out than girls who are catty and spiteful.

I think that letting them go at it is going to have to be the way...to a degree. Perhaps I'll go get them a set of boxing gloves each and let them settle the argument that way.

waterpolochick01

on May 25, 2004

LMAO!! im sorry, ,but thats really hilarious! theyll finally get the clue some day that fighting hurts. like, bad . lol hopefully , anyway!

good luck! youll always have us!

notsohighlyevolved

on May 25, 2004

Same thing with me and my brother. Me being the oldest i would always end up beating the bejesus out of him and he would always end up producing this air raid siren wail, calling the attention of both my parents and their wrath.

It got a lot worse when we were teenagers. Why don't we just give horse steroids to our kids earlier and get it over and done with?

Now we are the best of friends.

We still can't express our love for each other, but we use the jostle and the jibe instead of honest, declarative statements (not allowed between brothers, punishable by banishment) to express what is clear to everyone else - we can't do without each other.

Somehow, i think the fighting brought us closer together. We tested each others limitations. If you're anything like my parents (and by the sounds of it, you are. Trust me it's a good thing) then everything will be fine. Just don't expect the house or any of your property to remain untouched or unbroken until it is

Marco XX

dharmagrl

on May 25, 2004

I think they got a hint today, WPC. They're still complaning about being bruised and banged up....and about not getting a pool pass.

It's ok to laugh, I was laughing too.

Gerry Atrick

on May 25, 2004

dharma....thanks for letting me know what I have to look forward to...haha
at 6 and 4 mine arent too bad yet....if they do get into fights we can still seperate them and physiocally drag them to their rooms....at 12 or 13 we wont be able to do it.....
I'll be really interested to know if you find something that works.....tranquiliser gun maybe

dharmagrl

on May 25, 2004

Marco, I'm glad to know that you experienced the same kind of thing with your brother....and that you didn't kill each other!

I'm used to things getting broken; they've been destructive forces for years. If it can possibly be broken, Dharma's boys will break it. I'm thinking of hiring them out to companies that market products declared to be 'indestrucable'...'cos if it truly is, my boys won't be able to break it!

dharmagrl

on May 25, 2004

Gerry..mine are 9 and almost 8, so you don't have too much longer to wait until the hell that is brotherly love fully manifests itself! Actually, I'm thinking that this is just the tip of the iceberg, and that I'm going to have to break up much more destructive fights than today's little skirmish.

Hmm..something that works...shots of straight vodka for the parent, perhaps?

werewolf

on May 25, 2004

Actually it's a miracle that my brother and I are still alive. We used to throw darts at each other (not the sissy plastic kind, the good ol' metal pointy ones), lit kitchen matches, I held one end of a plastic jump rope while my brother climbed down it from the 5th floor to the 4th floor, I mixed up all the different liquid medications, in our medicine cabinet, in a glass and he drank it. (he liked it and wanted me to make him some more, but before I was finished, my parents were screaming their heads off...something about seizures, vomiting, whatever). I threw an M-80 into the shallow end of the pool while he was in the deep end (so he was only completely numb for a few days...builds character). He through me through a plate glass window, hit me in the cheek with one of those darts (it was fun squirting water through the little hole it made. At least I though it was fun, my Mom just freaked out.)

Ahhh, the good times

We are the best of buds now. We laugh, we cry.

kingbee

on May 25, 2004

i just saw a thing on tv last weekend about sibling rivalry with a segment focusing on a family with three sons, two of whom spent nearly all their time beatin hell outta each other. they were like 8 and 6...the other kid was 2 or 3 and both boys had no issues with him. the caveat here is that the segment involved john stossel who is like geraldos insipid twin. they brought in a shrink who watched tapes of the kids (they were damn near as horrible as my own young self) and then made two suggestions that seemed to actually work. one was sorta lame: both boys were awarded a positive sticker for doing nice things for each other and negative stickers for being mean. 3 mean ones and they were outta the box for the day (im pretty sure this woulda failed without the second technique) the other one was pretty slick and even from the vantage point of far too many years ago struck me as having possibilities. the parents and the shrink hadda talk with the older kid during which they made a big deal about how he was subverting his natural status in the family as the protector of the younger kids. the kid bought into it big time and no longer saw his younger brother as a rival.

dharmagrl

on May 25, 2004

Christ, Dave....I'm going to have nightmares now! Actually, I'm thankful that they're hitting each other with their fists and not ball bats or 2-by-4's. I too am surprised that you're alive, btw...

Kingbee: They'd laugh the sticker idea out of the park; they're very astute boys and would recognize it as the blatant bribe that it is. The talk might work, though. I'll have to think about what to say and how to say it....but that might be a good idea. I'll let you know how it goes.

Gerry Atrick

on May 25, 2004

Actually it's a miracle that my brother and I are still alive

You aint kidding....I'm off to get a large bottle of valium after reading this!!!!

werewolf

on May 25, 2004

After reading all the "adventures" we've had with our siblings I just had a weird twilight zone kind of moment. We are the parents now!!! ( well, yeah, kind of a DUH! thing but what the heck). I just can't possible imagine what my parents must have gone through. Man...I need to send them some flowers and a very long thank you letter.

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