I talked to my mum in the UK this morning.  She told me about an alarming incident that occurred on her street two nights ago. 'She lives in what the British call 'sheltered accommodation'.  It's like a retirement community; people have their own homes but have call buttons in each room should they fall and a warden comes by every day or so to check on them'

There's a little alleyway three houses down from her.  People are supposed to use it as a shortcut to get from one street to another, but the local junkies have started to use it as a place to shoot/smoke their smack and crack. 

Three nights ago, the man (I'll call him Mr. H) who lives in the house next to the alleyway got a knock on his door just after he'd gone to bed.  When he answered it, he found a man of eastern European origin on his doorstep, shaking and close to tears.  'There are mens in alley, and they scare me' he said.  'Please can call the police?  I please can hide with you?'

Mr. H was torn at first, because he didn't know if this man was a junkie/mugger who was using this as a scam to get into his house.....but he walked across his yard and peered down into the alley, and sure enough, there were four hooded figures in there.  So, he ran back into his house, dragged the eastern European man into his kitchen, locked the doors and put the kettle on for some tea (it's the English response to everything; put the kettle on and have some tea) - and then rang Thames Valley police (the local constabulary) to ask them to send some officers out.

'There are some men acting suspiciously in the alleyway next to my home' he said. 'Can you please send a constable out?'

'Well, can you first go down the alleyway and see if it's anyone you know?' said the dispatcher.

Mr. H was 'gob smacked'. 

So was mum.

So was I.  I still am.

 Instead of sending a policeman out, Thames Valley wanted Mr. H, an old age pensioner (he's 79) to approach these people and see if he knew any of them.  Mr. H said 'I may be a bigger man, but I'm still old! I can't defend myself should one of those junkies decide he wants to have a go at me!  If I go down there, you're likely to find me with my throat slit - if you ever send anyone out, that is.'

Someone eventually DID come out - 4 hours later.  Amazingly enough, they didn't find anyone in the alleyway. 

I'm not so much scared by the junkies in the alley as I am by the utter incompetence and flippant attitude of the local police force.  This is a prime example of Thames Valley policing at its best - useless.  Fucking useless, to be exact.  

And the Brits think American policing is bad.....