Knitting. Yarn. Fiber artistry. More knitting. Nursing school. Hospice work. Death and the dying process. Phoenix Raven's. Knitting. Yarn. Oh, and Life As An Air Force Wife.
...about Dave.
Published on April 16, 2004 By dharmagrl In Marital Issues
These are in no particular order....

Hearing his voice, in person, not at the end of a phone line.

Being able to reach out and touch him when I'm half asleep. We don't 'spoon' all night anymore, but as long as we're touching each other in some way both of us have agreed that we get a much better night's sleep. It's the comfort factor. I also miss feeling his breath on the back of my head when we do 'spoon', and the hair on his legs tickling me.

His smell. Not stinky smell, but just the smell of his skin, of his soap, shampoo and deodorant, mixed with his scent.....up until recently I could smell him on a shirt he had left behind, but that's all gone now. He's busy sleeping in the same shirt for a week straight so he can bag it up and mail it to me.....again, it's the comfort factor. I expect I'll just hold it and cry the first time I take it out of the bag.

The way his mustache tickles and prickles my lip when he kisses me.

Him giving me whisker burn on my cheek. He used to like to wrestle me down and rub his jaw on my face....not that I put up much of a fight, I kind of like it...

Watching him stretch when he first wakes up. He'll stretch out his arms, draw up his legs, yawn, and curl up his toes and fingers all at the same time. I've never seen anyone else stretch quite like that. It's actually very cute...but don't tell him I said that.

Seeing his things, his personal things around the house. His toiletries in the bathroom, his laundry in the basket (or on the bedroom floor), his keys on the table. His shoes by the door, that I really miss.

Having him drive everywhere - he says he can't stand to have me drive when he's perfectly capable of doing so. It's not because I'm a terrible driver, it's more because.....well, it's just a guy thing, dig? I think I'll WANT him to drive everywhere when he first gets home; I'll be sick of having to drive myself by then. Shit, I'm sick of it NOW.

Getting spontaneous hugs for no particular reason.

Laying around on the couch with him, watching TV. Some of the best times we had when he was on leave were when the kids were in school and we just laid around on the couch, watching daytime TV together. No pressure to go anywhere or do anything, just him and I, being 'us'.

Looking forward to the weekend because we get to spend time together. Weekends are the lonliest time for me now...everywhere I look I see families and couples doing stuff, and I'm constantly reminded that I'm alone.

Having some back-up when it comes to the kids. Just having someone else to re-iterate what I say, to help me reinforce the house rules etc.

Not having to go to parent-teacher conferences, school music programs, christmas shows etc alone!!!

Nookie. That goes without saying.

Believe it or not, I miss him farting. He's quite a prolific farter, is Dave....and I miss it.

I just miss HIM. It's that simple.



Dave, I know you read my blog. I love you....and as you can tell, I miss you horribly. You are the best, the absolute best husband, ever. You're a wonderful, an amazing person, and I consider myself incredibly fortunate to have you in my life...and even more fortunate that you chose me to be the one you grow old with. I love you with everything I have, and am proud to be your wife. May this journey continue, and may we always walk together.



Comments
on Apr 16, 2004
geez dharmagrl you've gone and nearly made me cry. i hope i can find someone as precious to me to grow old with as you have found.
on Apr 16, 2004
Aww, thanks Teeg...yeah, he's 'The One', I've known it for years now.
on Apr 17, 2004
As Phoebe would say "He's my lobster"...
on Apr 18, 2004
Wow, You made me tear up... I don't know how I could ever be away from my husband. I hope he comes home to you soon!
on Apr 18, 2004
Hell be back in August, Janders. He's been gone for 8 months. When he comes back we'll be going to England together for 4 years. Being apart from him has been the hardest thing I've ever done. I've learned the true meaning of lonliness...I've discovered that it really is possible to be surrounded by people but still be overwhelmingly lonely.
on Apr 18, 2004
I can't imagine what you are going through and hope to never experience it myself. I have a hard time when it is a couple of days away. Hope August comes quickly for you!
on Apr 18, 2004
I hope August comes in no time at all, I hope you are surrounded ny others you love. Blessing to you.
on Apr 18, 2004
It's just me and the kids up here in South Dakota, but my folks and my in-laws are only a phone call away. We're only 15 weeks and a few days away from being done with this assignment and the subsequent reunion (wow!! 15 weeks! That doesn't seem long at all!!! Yay!!!!)..then he won't have to go away from us for at least 6 months and maybe even a couple of years..and probably never for this long again.
on Apr 18, 2004
That was very moving to read dharmagrl. As I have been suffering so much the lack of my wife and daughters for the past 2 1/2 weeks I simply cannot imagine how you have managed. And I admire your ability to express your feelings about him.

It really is the little, everyday, common things that you miss the most, isn't it? The little things that remind you on a daily basis that you have someone to share your life, dreams, sorrows, and love with. I hope August comes swiftly for all of you.
on Apr 18, 2004
what a beautifully written article. nookie...that made me laugh.....

my sis calls it the bodiodo......hehe

Trinitie
on Apr 19, 2004
Yes, Dev, it is the little things. I want to bad to be able to feel his weight in our bed next to me at night....sometimes when I'm half asleep, I'll reach out for him..and wake up with this awful sensation in the pit of my stomach when all I feel is cold sheet and emptiness.
Being apart sucks, it really does. Having said that, however, it's given us a new-found realization of just how much we mean to each other, and that's priceless.