Down time

Published on August 20, 2006 By dharmagrl In Blogging

This is the first article I've written in over a week. The migraine that I wrote about in my last article lasted until Monday, and had to be chased away by a shot of some strong meds and a LOT of sleep Monday afternoon.

I just haven't felt like writing since then. I've taken some down time from blogging - from communicating with anyone, really. I haven't wanted to talk or email or see anyone, I just wanted to be left alone. I get that way sometimes. I dunno why...but I do know that it always passes and I always rebound from my fits of melancholy solitude.

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The kids are going back to school on Wednesday. I'm looking forward to that, as are they. They're bored, they say. They've done all they wanted to do over the summer, and they're ready to go back to school. I personally think that 3 months out of school every year is too long.

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I've been looking for some slouch boots to go with my skinny jeans. I found the skinny jeans (brand new pair) at the Goodwill store, and I also found what I consider to be the bargain shopping core of the year, if not the century: a pair of brand new Converse Chuck Taylors, all black with the Converse label graffitied in white on the sides...for $1.08. Yep, you read that right. $1.08. They fit me perfectly, and they too look awesome with my skinny jeans. I've also given in and bought some leggings - I wore them under a denim mini skirt with my Chucks (I rolled the tops down) and a black tank-top when I went grocery shopping and I got a LOT of compliments on my 'look'. It's not unusual for me to get positive comments on my clothes and style - I guess I'm pretty bohemian (and I mean truly bohemian and quirky, not the boho that everyone's using today. If you're wearing the same as everyone else, you're most certainly NOT boho in any shape or form). I just know what looks good on me and I'm not a fashion victim. If something doesn't look good on me, I won't wear it, no matter how 'in' it is.

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The only thing that I can find any solace in about dad's death is that he's not in pain anymore.

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I'm watching a show about psychics and mediums, and I wondered if Dad would try to send me a message if I went to one. I've decided that he wouldn't want me to waste my money. He didn't believe in all that hocus pokus, so I doubt that he'd made his presence known in that way. Having said that, however, there have been a couple of times when I've felt him near me. I've also felt people praying for me - so thank you, those of you who have mentioned me when you talked to your god and deity. It's really been a help.

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I have to go carve our Sunday roast now. I sure hope it's tender....there's nothing worse than tough, stringy roast beef. I'm going to take Alton Brown's advice and carve it against the grain of the meat, thereby making the slices tender.

Sunday lunch calls! Adios for now, JU!

Comments

Dr Guy

on Aug 20, 2006

I use to work with a guy (we still talk now and then) who had to get not one, but 2 shots of demerol (SP) when he got a really bad one. All I can say, is that I am sorry you get them. I have had a few, but none that lasted days, and I can remember each one as that is how few I have had. I am glad you are over it.

And I will be thinking of your roast when I eat my Burritos!

MasonM

on Aug 20, 2006

They used to drill a hole in the skull to relieve migraines. I think that was right before they applied the leeches.

Glad you're feeling better.

dharmagrl

on Aug 20, 2006

I use to work with a guy (we still talk now and then) who had to get not one, but 2 shots of demerol (SP) when he got a really bad one. All I can say, is that I am sorry you get them

Been there, done that too. Not fun, not in the slightest.

They used to drill a hole in the skull to relieve migraines

There have been times when I honestly would have taken that treatment over the headache. The only headache I've had that was worse than a migraine was when I was leaking cerebro-spinal fluid from the base of my spine - meaning that instead of my brain floating in the normal amount of fluid, it was sitting in a LOT less and bumping against my skull every time I moved. I collapsed in the foyer of the ER - that hasn't happened with a migraine yet, but I've come close to it a couple of times.

The good news, however, is that I went almost a year and a half without a migraine. I've had 2 recently, yes, but my dad's death and the related stress have a LOT to do with that.

I'm feeling much better headache wise. Emotion wise, I'm not so good. But, I'm working on that too.

It's just going to take some time.

foreverserenity

on Aug 20, 2006

Wow, you score some great finds! When you get the slouchy boots get ones that are taller than ankle height, knee length is even better!

I'm glad you're feeling better. When the time is right your dad will let you know. It's good that you feel his presence. Sometimes I walk into a room and smell garlic, which my father loved, and I know that he's 'around', once I got up and found shells from a garlic under my pillow, no kidding! It was a time when I was feeling really down and thinking about him. I wouldn't be able to explain even if I tried.

Anyway, good you're feeling better.

pseudosoldier

on Aug 20, 2006

I understand the need for some alone time. Just remember that your friends will be around when you need them.

jennifer1

on Aug 21, 2006

that sounds really painful and really serious.

Glad to hear the migraine has gone and you are uo and about.

jennifer1

on Aug 21, 2006

That was beautiful Little Whip

dharmagrl

on Aug 21, 2006

When you get the slouchy boots get ones that are taller than ankle height, knee length is even better!

Yeah, I had some back when they were cool the first time. I've seen some on eBay and I'm keeping my eye on them...but I'm not going to pay some stupid amount for used shoes.

Just remember that your friends will be around when you need them

Thank you, 'miah.

that sounds really painful and really serious

I was. I'd had a test done 2 days before where I had radioactive contrast material injected into my spine so the surgeon could see exactly where my discs were herniated at and how bad the scoliosis had gotten - and the hole that the needle made in the dura never sealed itself back up. Fluid leaked out of it for 2 days before the anesthesiologist did a blood patch procedure - she drew a BIG syringe full of my blood out of my arm and injected it into the epidural space to seal the hole. At one point all of the ER staff were in the room watching her do it, making me feel like a circus freak! The blood patch worked and I felt better within an hour and was able to walk out of the ER unassisted 3 hours later. It's something I NEVER want to do again, ever. I wouldn't wish that kind of pain on most people (I can't say 'anyone' because honestly I know of a few sexual predators and murderers I'd like to inflict that kind of pain on); it was one of the worst experiences I've ever had.

Do not stand at my grave and weep
I am not there; I do not sleep.

I had my brother read that poem on my behalf at Dad's funeral. I know that he's with me, and I see him all around me. The point I was trying to make was that he didn't believe in all that clairvoyant stuff when he was alive so he'd be highly unlikely to try to contact me through one.

JillUser

on Aug 21, 2006

So sorry to hear about the migraine. I'm not surprised that you're "still" having problems dealing with the loss of your dad. It hasn't been long at all.

I've been showing off the blanket to everyone who comes to see Ashley. They have all been seriously impressed. I keep meaning to take pictures and have Brad post them. The past weeks have been a blur for some reason

InBloom

on Aug 21, 2006

Glad you are feeling better this week. Hopefully you won't have to deal with another migraine for quite a long time. Also, I know that it will never go away, but I hope the pain of your loss becomes a little less as the days go by.

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