..you'll know about me when you are finished reading this.
I almost let my anger get the better of me this morning. Almost. For the first time in ages....but I maintained control of my chariot, and now I've moved on.
More often then not, as soon as I sit down to write an article such as this all the things I wanted to tell you disappear and I sit here, blank...trying to think of what it was I was going to say.
I can tolerate a lot of things, but one thing that really is guaranteed to press all the right buttons and trigger anger in me is arrogance, especially self-centered arrogance. People with huge egos irritate me greatly, especially when said ego is over inflated. Even now as I write and think about it I'm feeling the first stirrings of anger...so I'm going to get off this particular topic....
..and focus instead on love. The love of my family, of my friends, of my husband...the love that I have for other people, for my fellow human (even those with huge egos that irritate me).
Im building myself a little shrine. No, I don't worship anything or anyone. What I'm building is traditionally called a butsudan. It's a cabinet (mine's a bookshelf) and on it (or in it) you put all the things that you find assist you in getting in the right frame of mind to meditate. Mine so far has incense, my little soapstone buddha inscense warmer, my sandalwood mala, some tealight candles, pictures of my kids, my husband, and my parents, and books that I find helpful in my walk on the buddhist path. It's in a corner that the morning sunlight catches quite well - I find that having sunlight warming my body really aids my meditation practice. So, tomorrow morning, after my kids have gone to school, I'll sit on my little zafu cushion with my mala in my hands, light some incense, and just sit and 'be' for a while. if I'm lucky the sun will bless me with her presence and I'll be warmed by the light of nature whilst I sit. What a wonderful way to start the day....
I like the way my body looks now. I've gained a few pounds (I'm up to 123 now) and I also started on some hormone therapy (to try and help with the migraines). My breasts are fuller, I have bigger hips...I look and feel more feminine and womanly than I have in ages, and I'm enjoying it.
I like being barefoot. If the climate up here allowed, I'd wear sandals or have bare feet all the time.
My oven needs cleaned, but I keep finding reasons to not do it...my car needs washed, and I keep finding reasons to not do that either.
I think I might have the early symptoms of Multiple Sclerosis or some other central nervous system disease, but I'm not going to the doctor about it yet. I took a lot for me to write that, just so you know. If you're going to respond, please bear that in mind.
I'm doing quite well with being minimalistic. I've wanted to spend money on things I don't need but have managed to resist the temptation. I'm actually kinda pleased with myself for being able to do that.
I want to be more self disciplined. I'm trying to be more self disciplined...being minimalistc is part of that, for me. My husband is the most disciplined person I know - that's one of the things I most admire about him.
I'm a Gemini, and that's reflected in my personality a lot.
I'm going to fix pork chops for supper tonight....speaking of which, I need to go take them out of the freezer...