My pissed off mood is gone. I don't know what happened, but I do know that I felt it leave. I was sitting in front of my computer, reading MadPoet's Blog (after I had written my ode to Kurt) and I literally felt it slip off me..rather like letting a blanket fall from around your shoulders to the floor.
So now I'm in a mellow, a very mellow, mood..cooking some good food, listening to some Nirvana. The sun broke through the overcast sky this afternoon and there are people outside..kids playing, folks washing their cars.
"I need an easy friend, I do, with an ear to lend, I do, think you fit this shoe, I do, won't you have a clue."
I think I have a new 'easy friend'. Huh, I'm probably full of poo, but we'll see. I think my 'easy friend' knows it too...you have to understand that's it really quite something for me to say "I think I found a new friend"..I don't make firm friendships very easily, I have more acquaintances than I do real friends. Really, my only friend is my husband...everyone else I hold at arms length because I don't think they'll understand me. Today, however....but like I said, we'll see.
I like moods like this. I'm relishing this one...turning thoughts over and over in my head, examining them from every angle I can, looking at their many facets to see if I can see myself reflected therein....and if I can, what I look like. I love feeling like this - so non-emotional, so plainly neutral, able to see things for that they are without any fluff or pomp getting in the way. I feel like this after I've mediated sometimes...just very centered, very clear, very AWARE. I didn't meditate today, so this is a bonus, a real treat..
..oh my, "PennyRoyal Tea" just came on....
"I'm on my time.....with everyone. I have ....very...bad posture"