I'm packing my bag...

Published on April 13, 2006 By dharmagrl In Misc

...so I can be ready to go.

I'm not leaving home, I'm making a 'vigilance' bag so that next time I get asked to go sit with someone who's dying I can simply pick it up and be out the door - instead of having to run from room to room trying to find things I need to take with me. The hospice requires that we be there within 2 hours of being notified, but I think that I should get there as soon as possible - the other day I was there within half an hour, but had I dawdled....I'd have been too late. So, I'm trying to facilitate a fast response, and having a bag packed and ready to go is going to make things a LOT faster.

I know that I'm putting my bible in it. I just don't know what version to use. I have a New International version and I also have 'The Book' which is written in modern english. I like The Book, but it's not about what I like. Got any ideas, JU?

I'm also putting The Tibetan Book Of Living And Dying in my bag. It has some beautiful writing in it and I've found it incredibly comforting and reassuring. It's more spiritual than it is Buddhist, and I like that. This book is more for me than it is for the patient, but there are some things in there that I'd like to read aloud should the situation ever present itself again.

I'm taking a couple of bottles of water with me and a soda - vigilance volunteering almost always takes place in a nursing home or hospital and those places always have ice so it won't matter that my beverages are warm, I can chill them with a little ice.

Graham crackers and carmel corn rice cakes are also going to be included in case I'm there for an extended period of time. I'm not sure that eating in the presence of a person who's dying is appropriate, but....I'm taking something with me anyway. It's better to have them and never need them than it is to need them and not have them.

A toothbrush and paste, and a pack of those facial wipes in case I'm out overnight. Brushing my teeth and washing my face just makes me feel more awake. One of those travel deals with a miniature tube of paste should work well, and I can get a little travel pack of wipes too.

I'm throwing in a couple of pens and a legal pad in case I need to take notes (I have to record the events that happen whilst I'm there for the patient's hospice chart)....and that's about it. Unless any of you have any ideas, that is. Have I missed anything that you can see? Is there anything that you think I should take that I haven't thought of? Or are there things in the bag that you think inappropriate?

Any suggestions are welcome!

Comments

Dr Guy

on Apr 13, 2006

Suggestions? Dont worry about the version of the Bible. When it is the final exam, any version will do.

God bless, or Be in Buddha's arms dear lady.

lifehappens

on Apr 13, 2006

Also, you might bring poetry. Something to evoke pleasant memories?

ParaTed2k

on Apr 14, 2006

As far as versions of the Bible, some people are particular and some aren't... if you pull out a KJV with someone who detests it (yeah there are some that do) then you might offend them...

What I would suggest is that you start kind of a "journal" of passages from scripture, The Tibetan Book Of Living And Dying, poetry and other things that touch you. Along the way you will talk with patients, they will tell you things that you will want to refer to with future patients (sometimes favortie scriptures, quotes, or memories). Come up with a good way to organized them in a pad, or if you have a palm... that way they will all be readily accessible to you.

Not bringing whole books in also alleviates the risk of offending. It means you can use a passage from teh Tibetan Book of Living and Dying without actually telling the person that that's where it's from... if they ask, of course, tell them.

Your plan is a great one. Putting together a few things for patients and yourself can only serve to help you feel more together in heart wrenching situations. I am so proud of your decision to put others before yourself Karen. You are one of the best!

dharmagrl

on Apr 14, 2006

What I would suggest is that you start kind of a "journal" of passages from scripture, The Tibetan Book Of Living And Dying, poetry and other things that touch you

That's an excellent idea, Ted! That way I can keep adding to it as I go along.

Not bringing whole books in also alleviates the risk of offending. It means you can use a passage from teh Tibetan Book of Living and Dying without actually telling the person that that's where it's from... if they ask, of course, tell them

Exactly...however the patients that I go to sit with as a vigilance volunteer are usually unresponsive because they're so close to the end. The likelihood of them seeing what I'm reading is slim - but still, it's a better idea to have a journal of my own to read from.

Your plan is a great one. Putting together a few things for patients and yourself can only serve to help you feel more together in heart wrenching situations.

Thank you, Ted. Coming from you, that means a lot to me. You're more experienced in planning than I!

I have some questions for you; I'm going to email you later today.

JollyFE

on Apr 14, 2006

First off, MGBU for doing this. I had a very close friend of mine die from cancer a year ago this month. Hospice was a God send to the family.

Concur with Dr. Guy. Any version will do. I was asked to do one of the Readings for his Mass (Cahtolic). We have four or five Bibles in the house. None of them have the same wording for passage I read. I finally asked the Priest for the copy he wanted read.

JollyFE

dharmagrl

on Apr 14, 2006

First off, MGBU for doing this. I had a very close friend of mine die from cancer a year ago this month. Hospice was a God send to the family.

I don't know what MGBU means, but I think I ought to thank you for it.....right?

I'm glad that your hospice experience was a good one. A lot of people think hospice kills people, that we're all Dr Kevorkian-esque - when that's far from the truth. Yes, we're in the business of people dying, but pallative care is all about helping people LIVE as well. We enable people to have the best life they can before they shuffle off this mortal coil, and when their time does come ...we help them have a dignified, peaceful departure. I know that if I am ever terminally ill, I want hospice care. Without a doubt, that's the way I want to end my life.

We have four or five Bibles in the house. None of them have the same wording for passage I read.

Yeah, I'm running into the same issue. The only thing I can think of is to carry a copy of every version - or print out a copy of popular verses from every kind of bible and carry them in my journal.

Thank you for your kind words and for telling me about your positive hospice experience!

pseudosoldier

on Apr 14, 2006

I don't know what MGBU means

My guess is "May God Bless yoU".

We have four or five Bibles in the house. None of them have the same wording for passage I read.

Well, besides them being approved (officially or tacitly) by various sects of Christianity (so that certain branches prefer or even solely recognize certain versions), I actually see that referencing different versions might give deeper insight into a particular passage... but that's more for research and personal reflection than trying to reassure someone who needs comfort. If it was possible to find out which version that person prefers, that would be the one to take. That might not be possible, though.

You are doing a great service. I pray that you are blessed for it (and I feel you are, and will be).

dharmagrl

on Apr 14, 2006

My guess is "May God Bless yoU".

Ah. Yeah, that sounds about right.

You are doing a great service. I pray that you are blessed for it (and I feel you are, and will be

I think I will be. Sometime.....

KFC Kickin For Christ

on Apr 14, 2006

I think your choice of NIV is just fine Dharma. Carrying all the versions will make for one heavy bag. The NIV is usually the easiest version for most.

I pack a bag like you and have ready also but for not nearly as noble reasons as what you're doing. I have my bag ready for my HS team. In it I have several of the same things you do. I add a few powerbars for nutrition and gum and always a few extra pairs of socks. Have you thought of something like sneakers to take a five minute stroll outside if needed? Especially if you're there for a long period of time. Is that allowed? Can help clear the mind and refresh you if it's ok to do so.

When I sat at my M-i-l's deathbed. I found myself reading the Psalms for comfort and holding her hand. I think she just liked having someone to touch and feel connected to.

Blessings!!!

pseudosoldier

on Apr 14, 2006

I think I will be. Sometime.....

Drop me a line.

AngelaMarie88

on Apr 15, 2006

You can bring anything you'd like. I like all of your ideas, they're thoughtful.

But even if you should be caught without your bag o' stuff, you've already got the most important things-- yourself and your heart and simply being there for them with everything that you are.

That's neat stuff you're doing.

dharmagrl

on Apr 15, 2006

Have you thought of something like sneakers to take a five minute stroll outside if needed? Especially if you're there for a long period of time. Is that allowed?

We can do whatever we think is apporopriate, but leaving the room of a person close to death isn't a good idea, even if it's only for a few minutes. The reason I'm there is so that the person won't die alone - if I were to leave and the person died whilst I was gone I'd have defeated the entire purpose of my being there. So, whilst your idea is a wonderful one, it's not something I'm going to be able to do.

Thanks for the idea, though!

Drop me a line

Okey doke....

But even if you should be caught without your bag o' stuff, you've already got the most important things-- yourself and your heart and simply being there for them with everything that you are.

That's neat stuff you're doing.

Thanks! That's very meaningful to me that you would say something like that, especially since I wasn't very nice to you the last time we talked. So, thank you for the comment, and also please accept my apologies......

AngelaMarie88

on Apr 17, 2006

Thanks, and please accept my apologies as well. I was upset at first but then stepped back and was able to take your words constructively.

You taught me to calm down and be more tolerant, less judgmental, develop a thicker skin, etc, and I do appreciate it. We learn through hard knocks, don't we?

(((dharma)))

dharmagrl

on Apr 17, 2006

Yes, we do. Youv'e taught me to be more patient and less judgemental as well, so it's been a symbiotic relationship!

(((Angela))) - right back at ya, babe!

JollyFE

on Apr 18, 2006

Reply By: dharmagrl Posted: Friday, April 14, 2006
My guess is "May God Bless yoU".

Ah. Yeah, that sounds about right.

Yep. Combat aviator parlance for "May God Bless You" or sometimes seen as just GBU. I believe it came out of the North Vietnam POW camps as part of the shorthand for the tap code.

JollyFE

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