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..or becoming one, anyway.
Published on March 24, 2004 By dharmagrl In Misc
My last blog inspired me to take a look at myself......

..I'm becoming a girly girl.

I used to be a tomboy, a real guy's girl..a 'lad-ette' as the British put it. More at home in jeans and boots than a dress and heels, determined to hang as tough as any guy...and I did, even if it meant getting injured. I've played flag and full contact football where I've been the only lad-ette on the team, I've drank as much as (if not more than) quite a few dudes I've hung out with, I've out-shot and out-cussed men, and I've proven myself as hard-working as any guy when it comes to pyhsical labor. I've always had short hair, I've never really been too terribly interested in haute coture and comfort and function always came before fashion or style. I've historically always had more guy friends than girl friends, I just did better with dudes. I had little respect for women who whined that they'd broken a nail unclogging the toilet or who stood lamely by at the side of the highway whilst men they didn't know changed their flat tire.

All that's been changing. It's been changing for a couple of years, but I only just now (today, in fact) realized it. The thing that tipped me off was my obsession with shoes. Not practical shoes, either. Pretty heels, stilettoes with straps and bows, dainty little things that make my legs look longer and my calves look toned....despite the fact that they give me blisters.

I got to thinking...

I find myself seeking female more than male companionship. There's just something about being amongst intelligent, witty women that beats being with a group of guys anyday. Guys have their place, but more and more I find myself turning to and doing better with chicks...and that never used to be the case.

I have a thing for skirts and dresses too. I have come to the conclusion that they're more comfortable than pants and shorts, and have decided that all I'm going to wear this summer is skirts and dresses (to go with all the pretty shoes I've been collecting) The only times I wear pants is 1) it's cold and raining/snowing and a skirt is impractical for the climate (I can't get the hang of stockings or hose, I really can't get used to the feel of them) ,2) I want my ass to make an impression and I know a pair of pants will help that along, or 3) I'm going to yoga class...skirts REALLY don't work there.

I can't seem to force myself to leave the house without make-up these days. Even if I'm just running to the store or driving the kids to school I'll take 30 seconds to put on a bit of powder and some mascara.

I have hats. Lots of hats. I like my hats, I like wearing them, I like the way they look...but I also like that I don't have to do anything with my hair, I can just pull on a hat and go...a bit of the lad-ette coming out, I think.

I still like my lad-ette side. I like being able to fend for myself, being tough...but I like the girly facade that covers that. I like that I can be both girly and tough...mowing my own lawn or changing the oil in my car in a skirt and heels, playing ball with or shooting better than guys, taking down and cuffing dudes and dudettes whilst my male counterparts stood there watching. I still have liitle respect for my sisters who can't change their own tire, but that's the lad-ette in me coming out...actually, that's the independant Dharma speaking, and that's just one of my pet peeves.

So, on being a girly girl....I'm loving it. May this journey continue....may I be sixty-five, still wearing my heels and skirts and hats, on the side of the interstate, changing my own flat tire in full-on make up....

..viva la femme! You go, girl!

Comments
on Mar 24, 2004
Dharma, I think we are kindred spirits. My journey to girlyhood started more in late college, early marriage. I always felt more at home around guys growing up. I did the football thing too! I also liked not so girly stuff like sci-fi and fantasy books. In middle school I was the only girl that had read the Piers Anthony Zanth books.

I was the only female in most of my classes at college (especially my engineering classes). I maintained my own vehicles until we started leasing through our company. I can shoot a bow, throw a knife and shoot a gun. I can change oil or a tire. I think paintball is a blast!

I am enjoying being girly though. I was never interested in shoes but like them more these days. I like to be comfortable but am now willing to give up some comfort to look better. I try not to leave the house without blush and lipstick (I have no color otherwise). I don't think any less of anyone who doesn't wear makeup than those who wear perfect makeup all the time. I think everyone should pursue what makes them happy with themselves and be okay with the fact that it is different for everyone.

I think I am going to start buying hats. The bad hair cover up is appealing to me

You go girly girl!
on Mar 24, 2004
Yay! We're kindred spirit girly girls!

It's a shame we don't live closer, we could leave the kids with out respective spouses and go have a girly girl day shopping for hats and shoes!!

i'm telling you, hats are the way to go....stylish and practical too! What more could a girl ask for?!
on Mar 24, 2004
I meant 'with our', not 'with out'...don't want people thinking I'd leave my kids alone....
on Mar 24, 2004
I think it's cool to embrace a number of personality traits...go with what works for ya, but don't lose track of the person you are because you think you're supposed to be a certain way. I've found that I can get along with my friend who wouldn't leave the house to get the mail without makeup and my other friends who rarely shower and wear the same jeans for 3 weeks before airing them out in the same night....because these people are true to themselves. So don't sweat doing it.........unless you find something to sweat about it when you question your motivations.
on Mar 24, 2004
I am wearing pigtails today. I look 'cute' or so says half-a-dozen people that I have run into. It's one of the first times in a long time that I've even looked faintly feminine. I liked the boy-look. I used to have very short, spikey hair. Wore just jeans, sneakers, and t-shirts. Now, my hair is much longer and I've bought some pretty nice, pretty girlie things. I wonder if it is the weather, or if we are all on some similar kick. I have always been just one of the guys, too. Now, I'm not, and I wonder if it's because I am changing physically, or acting differently somehow. Either way, I think that just feeling comfortable with yourself, no matter how you look is great. Confident. And sexy.
on Mar 24, 2004
And that's what I'm doing Ted...trying to remain true to myself but going with the progression of things, of my life, of my personality. I don't try to be something/someone I'm not anymore, I did that my entire twenties (sad, but true). I suppose I'm relishing being myself and seeing where 'me' will go.
Nice to see you here, btw...come back again!
on Mar 24, 2004
I dunno. We're (Jill, Nic and I) all roughly the same age, aren't we? Maybe that has something to do with it.

I'm all for feeling confident in your own skin...sexiness just comes along with that, I think.