When I was a teenager, my mother used to come into my room and look at the posters of Duran Duran, the Psychedelic Furs, Flock Of Seagulls, Simple Minds, Spandau Ballet and The Clash and make disparaging remarks:
"he looks like he could use a bottle of shampoo and a comb"
"is he wearing MAKEUP???!!"
"what on earth's that he's wearing? A bedsheet with holes cut in it?"
"I simply do not understand why it's necessary to dye your hair those colors. It's really most undignified"
As Will Smith said, 'Parent's Just Don't Understand'.
As I got older I swore that when I had kids I'd never be old fashioned and un-cool like my mother. Oh no, not I. I was going to be the uber-trendy mom, the one who was hip and into the newest bands and who SET trends instead of following them.
I thought I was doing pretty well. Until last night.
My daughter and I were in the BX getting her a hairdryer. She asked if she could get a magazine, so we strolled over to the rack and she picked one out.
"ooh, this is the best band ever!" she squealed, picking up a magazine with three boys wearing eyeliner on the cover "Panic At The Disco are AWESOME!!!!"
"they all look as if they could use a bottle of shampoo and a co.......oh my gawd. I can't believe I said that. I HAVE become my mother"
Yes, it's true. I have succumbed to the middle age way of thinking. I've criticized my teenage daughter's favorite band. I'd best go break out the jeans with elasticated waists and tapered legs, to be worn with white tennis shoes and T-shirts with kittens or puppies on the front. I should stop wearing make-up and start wearing my hair in a ponytail everyday, and I should sell my Explorer and get a minivan so that I can drive my kids to soccer practice and sit with the other moms talking about Tupperware and PTA meetings. I should acquire a collection of holiday themed sweater vests and wear them over appropriately colored turtleneck sweaters - with the elastic waist jeans with the tapered legs and the white tennis shoes, of course.
It's happened. I've become my mother.
Nooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!