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Published on February 22, 2005 By dharmagrl In Misc

I think I'm going to take up a new career as a spy.  I have nothing better to do.....and this seems like it might be a fun job.

I'm going to use my knitting as a cover operation, and I'm going to write to people, volunteering to knit a hat for them....and then I'm going to use the information they give me to spy on them.

Yes, I'm going to leave my home and my family, waste all my husband's hard earned money on gas, cheap motels and fast food, and I'm going to spy on people.  I'm going to use my 3 megapixel cheap-o digital camera, wear my Sam Spade trenchcoat and hat, take up smoking, drinking coffee from a thermos, eat a dozen doughnuts every day and cultivate a nice set of hemmarhoids and I'm going to sit outside people's houses and apartments and take pictures of them. Then, when I've got 'inside' information on them, I'm going to use that information...for what I don't know yet, but I'm sure something will come to me.

So, if I've knitted or have volunteered to knit a beanie for you, look out.  Keep your blinds pulled tight and lock your doors, change your telephone numbers, keep a lookout for a short redheaded chick wearing a variety of fake noses, glasses with no lenses and an assortment of different hats when you're strolling through the park or the mall,  and take a different route to and from work every day because you never know when I might be there, watching you.....

...and don't think that living in a different country means you're 'safe' from me....Quantas and British Airways are offering some remarkably cheap flights at this time you year, y'know.

No-one is safe from Dharma the spy.....

 

 

 

 

 

(this might have seemed like a crack-headed article to some of you, but there are a few who will hopefully get a giggle out of it....either that or become a little more paranoid....)


Comments (Page 2)
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on Feb 23, 2005

Sweet Madame Defarge style spywork........

Why thank you...thank you very much!

Tell the guys in dark glasses at the gate yer here to see modman..

Oh, those dudes know me, they'll let me in...me being the very important person that I am.

 

I don't know what brought on this article, but it made me laugh!

I'll email you and tell you....

 

I'm going to start calling you "Madame Defarge."

Hmm..'Madame Dharma Defarge'.....yeah, I like that!

 

I see you too...

Hehe.....

 

You kill me dharma, really....stop...stop...(rolling on the floor)!

I'm glad you got a chuckle out of it!

 

So instead of a dead horse's head, I should be looking out for a beanie? Just make sure you order it shaken not stirred.

Yep, the beanie is my calling card...and I like your user name, btw.

 

Thanks for the laugh!

Welcome!

 

Hmm, looks like I better put some tinfoil in that beanie you mentioned!

No, tinfoil is worthless against the powers of the very important Dharma Defarge....

on Feb 23, 2005
Liberte! Equalite! Fraternite!
on Feb 24, 2005
Your coming here?!?! YAY! When? Ill be looking out for ya!
xP
on Feb 24, 2005
She's the spy
named Dharma
she's got a beanie
and knits stuff for you
She's the spy
named Dharma
and she is coming
now to spy on you

I'll leave the door open.
on Feb 24, 2005
but...I still get the beanie, right?  I guess next time I should realize that somebody doesn't need your social security number in order to knit you a hat.  One of these days I'll learn that  
on Feb 24, 2005

Liberte! Equalite! Fraternite!

Oui, mon frere...ca c'est tres vrai! 

Your coming here?!?! YAY! When?

Ah, I can't tell you that....then I'd be blowing my cover.

I'll leave the door open

Cool!  I can leave my slim jims and picks at home!

but...I still get the beanie, right?

Yeah, you still get the beanie....

I guess next time I should realize that somebody doesn't need your social security number in order to knit you a hat. One of these days I'll learn that

Oh, but I do need it...see, the number of stitches I have to cast in is directly related to your social. (hehe....)

on Feb 25, 2005
great article dharma.
hmmm....maybe that car really was following me this morning?
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